Sunday, January 20, 2008

Show and go

The 2007 International Motorcycle Show of Greater New York/social experiment went off without a hitch four weekends ago. The Hooligan contingent, represented by P. Adams, B.T. Thomas, M.L. Brown, L. Loo, and Sophiekinz, responded with apathy to the vast assortment of shiny new plastic motorcycles on display.
Chauffeured by Brady in his silver Japanese chariot, the band of hooligans descended upon the Jacob Javits Center with verve and aplomb, anticipating slightly more merriment than what was provided one week prior (see Electroma).
The hooligans marveled slightly over the machines, expressing interest mostly in their performance capabilities and handling. They were however, noticeably upset with the cookie cutter looks and styling of nearly all of the new motorcycles on display. Marlo registered his disgust over the egregious use of plastic parts. Of particular note was the new Harley Davidson X-treem Machine which, marketed exclusively through Walmart and made entirely of plastic, melts shortly after startup into a ball of carcinogenic goo.
Naturally, the fivesome gravitated most towards the older classic motorcycles on display. Most marveled over was the vintage rocket powered missile bike which propelled its Caucasian occupant to a speed in excess of 250 mph over the Utah salt flats. Marlo knew that he was with a special girl when Loo Loo said that, given the opportunity to ride any motorcycle in the universe, she would choose a vintage Triumph. Showing his Jewish roots and inclination towards materialism Marlo disagreed, stating that he would prefer the rarest and most expensive motorcycle in the world, the Aprillia, an Italian design costing over $120,000.
And what would a motorcycle show be without a fine display of custom choppers! Owing to the incredible success of OCC’s custom themed Treacher Collins Custom displayed at last year’s show, Exile Cycles pulled out all stops in creating their own version of a TC bike, aptly christened "Eyes without a face." The abomination played on the plastic theme of the show and morphed a 2004 Kawasaki ZX-11 sportbike into a disgusting monster. Featuring a custom molded polycarbonate fairing designed to resemble the crying faces of parents who’ve just realized their son or daughter has Treacher Collins and a gas tank crafted to resemble a casket, the rider is subtlety forced to deal with the harsh existence of a terrible genetic mistake.
After working up a strong appetite the hooligans headed over to Pub King for burgers and steaks and Marlo revealed to all that he will soon be traveling to Israel on a full scholarship.
Congrats Marlo and good luck!

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